"Say what you want to say, not what you ought to say."

I came across this quote while I was reading an article online, and it got me thinking. Is it really possible to say whatever we want to say, without considering the consequences that may come with our words? I think I am the type of person that say what I ought to say, because I am scared of offending people and being laughed at. Sometimes I am not even able to say what I ought to say because I am suffering from glossophobia, which is the fear of speaking.

Actually this fear has been haunting me since primary school, after a really traumatising experience that I don't wish to recall. My mind is capable of turning blank everytime it is my turn to speak, but deep down inside I DO have a few ideas that I want to share. For me to speak fluently, every word must be scripted from the beginning and all the way to the last word. I cannot imagine myself doing impromptu speech because I am a huge nervous wreck and I get nervous super easily. I am also not the kind of person that thinks on the feet.

I really admire those speakers that can speak naturally and fluently without pauses. HOW on earth do they do that? I know that this fear of mine is not going to do me any good in uni, because there is this section in tutorial classes called "class participation" and some of it will require presentation.

Until the day the fear in me goes away, my mind will not rest in peace!!!! I am determined to face up to my fear!!!! No more hiding! I need tips to make my fear go away. Maybe I should go for counselling or therapy sessions. In last lecture of psychology, we learn that it is possible to induce fear in a person. Since psychology is able to induce fear, I think it is also able to remove it! Maybe I can approach the psychology lecturer and ask him about it. haha

PHEW! I feel better after pouring my heart out. If I bottle this up, you see the EMO side of me everyday.haha